tent warningsmisgendering, deadnaming, slurs

  [colpse]Chapter 3: Aodations2023 October 7SaturdayOne of the sponsors—I ’t tell whh the tears—drops off my dinner while I’m still in the middle of panig. After I finally pull myself together enough to eat, I start thinking rationally again.

  These bitches seem so vine being dangerous that they put together aire extrajudicial prison—and under a college dorm somehow—to hold me. No, they’re actually vihat all four of us are dangerous, and based on the number of cells in this hallway, there may be more ing.

  I almost imagine what they’re thinking. From their ed point of view, men like Dee—I flinch for a moment before remembering they ’t actually read my thoughts—men like Dee are women just like them, and somebody like me or Seb—who knows, maybe Seb snaps one day and does something like… something drastic—we seem likely to try hurting one of these “i” “women”. And if you’ve really got your panties in a bunch, Andrew doesn’t seem great, either.

  What’s clear is that to them, men like us don’t deserve any rights, and women—and meending to be women—deserve anything they want.

  But then there’s or. Nobody would think he’s capable of hurting anyone. Hell, if he ever tried to cause somebody harm, he’d probably start apologizing and then have a panic attack over it being ahing he couldn’t aplish.

  And or actually seems to like his sponsor, so he either acquired a textbook case of Sto Syndrome in the ohat he’s been here, or the women here have actually shown they care for him. In spite of him being a man, I’m sure, but still.

  And further, if they really didn’t give a shit about us, why didn’t they just turn us inter meat or whatever it is they do to the wash outs from the moment they grabbed us off the street?

  So, they must care in some twisted way. Which meah probably isn’t lying about being able to leave once I finish her program.

  Based on this thread of logic, it’s clear what I have to do. I’ll make the “choice” to stay, py along for however long it takes for them to think I’m “reformed”, and then burn this pce to the ground.

  ht. It’s already uhe ground. Regardless, they’ll pay for holding me here.

  2023 October 8SundayI eat my usual banana and cereal bar. After a while of me waiting for the now familiar click of Beth’s heels, she walks up to the cell door, and she starts to speak.

  “M, Joe. Did you give some thought to my question?”

  “Stick with the program or wash out? It hardly seems like a real choice.”

  “I uand what you’re saying, but it is the choice yiven.”

  “Fihen. I’ll stay.”

  “Great!” Beth cps her hands together. “Now, follow me, and I’ll show you to some nicer aodations.”

  Oh thank God. I was beginning to think this crappy cell was my new perma home.

  Once agaih steps to my right after opening the door. I step through, ah guides me out of the cell hallway—cell block?—and toward the doors that lead to the showers.

  There’s no Ames this time, but there is a Asian woman with her back to the wall of the hallway, and she’s watg us very carefully. She’s armed with a taser, just like all the others. Whe to the showers, Beth tells me to tur.

  “The doors are closed,” I say.

  “See that box?” Beth says. “Put your finger on the sensor, and it should let you through.”

  I guess the fingerprint readers aren’t exclusively for the sponsors.

  After followih’s instrus to open the doors, I enter another hallway with five more doors on each side. Beth tells me to open the sed door on the left, I do so, and theells me to enter.

  “Et voilà! Your home away from home. It may not be as grand as an Ameri hotel room, but the bed is soft, the chair rolls smooth, and I’ve eveold the walls were given a fresh coat of paint a couple years ago.”

  It’s an actual dorm room. Not as nice as the apartment my parents got me at Saints, but han my old room at Bradford Mley and—based on there being only one bed—just for me. pared to the cell I was in, it’s paradise.

  That said, I don’t usually associate paradise with handcuffs attached to the bed I’m sleeping in. “Don’t worry about those,” Beth says as I leao get a closer look. “As long as you py nice, we just leave those tucked uhe bed and not think about them.”

  “Now what else?” she says. “The phone here is mostly for media aing ahold of me. It won’t call out and it should be left here whenever you’re in the on area. It’s good to be social. Oh, and whenever you want to open the door, press your thumb on this ser. It’s just like the others, except for these little lights on top. Green means you and I get through. Red means you’re locked in and only I get through.”

  “What if the red light is on but I o pee?”

  “Then I hope you kept a spare water bottle handy.”

  Beth tinues, “And that should be it. I’m going to leave you be. By now you should have full access to your room, the showers, and the on area. Get fortable with your new aodations, a us for lunch. Oh, and you should know there’s cameras in here, too. ’t be too safe. Yes, boys have needs and I’m sure you’ll have to take care of yours at some point. I promise nobody w the cameras cares, but you always hide uhe duvet if you’re feeling shy.”

  I want to tell her how gross she’s being, but she quickly leaves my new room and closes the door behind her.

  I take a look around. There’s a desk holding the shower kit I used yesterday—I guess somebody moved it while I was in the on room—a puter, and the phoh mentiohere’s also a wardrobe with two doors, each hiding a full-length mirror behind it. I’m not sure why the wardrobe has multiple mirrors, though, because the only things inside are some towels and more sets of pin looking workout clothes.

  I pick up the pho looks like it has sensus installed on it, but when I open the app, the spsh s reveals that it’s a version named Dorley sensus. I’m already logged in to an at using my full name.

  I quickly poke around my profile settings to shorten my dispy o simply say “Joe”. Nobody says “Joseph” except my dad and only when he’s upset about something.

  I’m not ected to any servers on sensus (of course), but I see Beth listed as a “friend” in the DM se.

  Joesiegel sievtxo

  Bethanyyes?

  JoeFat fihe send button while trying to swipe to the home s.

  Bethany??

  I really don’t like how casual my kidnapper is being about this whole thing.

  In addition to sensus, the phone has an app for pying media and what looks like an app for trolling media pyba the puter. The whole phone-puter setup is pretty slick, holy. Whoever is doing their tech could give up w with the kidnappers and find a real job no problem.

  That said, the media’s all trash. Lots of girly pop musid chick flicks. There’s an ebook reader, too, with books anized into folders by geons of romance further anized into categories like “hatever that means. Would it have killed them to put some graphiovels on here?

  I poke at the puter . Same sensus along with an additional shortcut right on the desktop beled “Message Sponsor”. It sends me straight into a chat with Beth. Same media colle. There are a few games installed, though. Tetris, Stardew Valley, The Sims—I guess I could drown a couple of them whenever I o let off some steam—and shit, is that KSP?

  I spend the couple hours trying to send funny greeo the Mun before or knoy door. He wants to know if I’m joining the rest of them for lunch.

  2023 October 14thSaturday“Weetabix again?” I pin. “’t they at least give us some Cheerios?”

  “It’s funny,” or says. “There was about a year when I was a kid that I ate this stuff every single m. My parents would offer me something else, and I’d insist that Weetabix was fihen one day I couldn’t stand it anymore. And now that it’s been a while, it’s fine again.”

  A voice from across the table barks out, “’t you two shut up? Nobody cares what you think about the cereal.”

  “Ethan, you just got back from a night in the cells. Why don’t you try ag nice for once, and maybe you’d have an easier time here.”

  “Sorry, Maria,” Ethan says as he rolls his eyes.

  Ethan first got access to the on room st Wednesday, and by Friday he’d already tried to pull the taser off his sponsor Maria, that East Asian woman I saw earlier. I guess they fot to warn him that they’re locked to their owners, or maybe he’s just too stupid to listen. He immediately got to experiehe business end of Beth’s taser for his trouble. The look ih’s eyes as she zapped him was… intense.

  Much more intense, actually, than when I got my own tasing the day prior. I was getting sick of being ordered in and out of the dining room immediately before and after each meal, so I calmly insisted after dihat night that I was still eating and wouldn’t be getting up. After ten minutes of me sitting with my admittedly empty pte, Beth said she’d given her final warning and then pulled the trigger.

  She led me to my room after that. She cimed I was ag like a “spoilt child throwing a tantrum,” but I’d say I was ag more like a man standing up for his rights.

  Her eyes looked more tired than anything else during that ordeal. Like I’d actually disappointed her.

  Along with their tendency to boss me around—I bet if I was gay or something they’d treat me better—I’ve noticed the sponsors have been keeping a very close eye ohan and I whenever we’re near each other. They’re probably worried we might try to pull something off together, seeing how we are the only two here who have actually done anything violent in the past.

  But the thing is, I ’t stand the guy. He acts all macho like he o prove to everybody else that he’s the ma man in a room full of men, and that includes practically bragging about the reason he’s here: physically abusing his st two girlfriends for “failing to show him proper respect.”

  Like, me and my buddies ba the States would joke around about girls we’d see at the bar or at parties, and I’m not afraid to get in a fight when it’s about something that actually matters, but there are some lines you just don’t cross.

  What makes it even dumber is that he doesn’t have anything to prove. The dude is well over six feet tall and solidly built.

  After breakfast, we all head to the on room. I join Andrew and Seb who are still in the middle of a versatioarted at breakfast.

  “What’s up?” I ask.

  “Seb was just telling me about some of the weirdos he used to mess with online,” Andrew says. “Seb, what was the name of that o page you mentioned, ‘tranny partners’?”

  “Yeah, something like that,” Seb says.

  “Well?” Andrew motions for him to tinue.

  “Um,” Seb starts. “Well, like, there was this one woman who posted that she thought her boyfriend was trans.”

  “Yeah?” says Andrew.

  “She actally found some clothes and makeup he’d hidden itom of his dresser,” Seb tinues, “and the crazy thing is, instead of asking how to set him straight, she wanted advi how to help him feel more like a girl. Really, a lot of the posts on there are like that: people who have somehow been vihat helping their partner do a sex ge is actually a good thing.”

  “Jesus Christ,” I say.

  “And what did you tell this woman?” Andrew asks.

  “Nothing,” answers Seb. “I figured she was getting herself into a big enough mess as it was. I didn’t feel the o pile on.”

  “I would have just dropped the boyfriend and started running if I were her,” Andrew says.

  “You never know,” says Seb. “Maybe she’s bi. Still won’t be the same as being with a real woman, though.”

  “Right, bi, as if,” I say.

  The two of them stop talking and stare at me like I just told them I have a sed head. Fortunately, Maria interrupts the awkward moment by stepping in front of the doors to the main hallway, g her hands, and starting to speak.

  “Alright, everyone. We have anuest joining us today, ahe st one. So please act weling whes here. I’m talking to you, Ethan.”

  Ethan looks like he’s trying to flip her the bird but fot to put his index finger down.

  A minute or so ter, the on room doors open, revealing the final member of roup and his sponsor, a tall blonde woman wearing a dress that looks like it was made just for her.

  Oh fuo.

  “You’re one of those bitches from the club!” I yell.

  “o see you again, too, Joe. My name Paige, in case you fot. And this is Tyler.”

  “Right, hi,” I say.

  Tyler, a sy guy, barely taller thah, gives a timid little wave. Jesus, this guy is even less of a threat than or.

  I choose to ignore him for the moment.

  “So, Paige, does yirlfriend know you kidnap people for a living? And what about that ginger you’re friends with? The one who’s been eying me around campus. Did she tell y’all to pick me up?”

  Beth answers, “Joe. Just because a girl looks at you and seems doesn’t mean she wants to kidnap you.”

  Beth and Paige proceed to ignore me and start talking with one-another.

  “I’m gd you agreed to take a boy after all, Paige.”

  “Yes, well, I… have some experience w with this type of boy.”

  ht, Tyler. By now he’s already sat down at a table o Ethan. I should probably offer him a warning.

  “So, Tyler, what’s your deal?”

  “I used to work in puter restoration services.”

  Why would they… oh.

  “You mean ransomware?”

  He shrugs and says, “Hey, if they’re stupid enough to click every random link they see, then maybe they deserve to pay for my help.”

  I start thinking about when my Nana lost half her savings to a puter scammer. She was devastated, and of course my dad did hardly anything to help her.

  “She’s not my mom,” he said. Regardless, he could have paid her everything she lost without putting a dent in his finances.

  Yeah, screw this guy. Tyler take his ces with Ethan. I’ll stick with the other three.