“ADAM! AGAIN?! Are you seriously back here—again?!”

  Yep, that's him. The so-called God of the so-called whatever called 'universe tree' and he’s got lung yelling strength like that of a thunderstorm. Can’t really bme the guy though. If I were in him and had to deal with the same idiot a hundred times in a row, I’d go insane too.

  Name’s Adam. Adam Wagner, from German. And yes, you heard that right—I’ve died 99 times. Count ’em. It ain't metaphorically. I meant it quite literally.

  It all started in my old, boring Earth life. After I graduated, I took my majors in business and finance program because, well, what else was I gonna do? I didn’t have any better options. Computer science? Off to the homeless shelter then. I barely went to csses, mostly stayed in my dorm, pulled all-nighters gaming, binging anime till 5 a.m., and reading manga like my life depended on it or else I would miss like thousand of lore details.

  Social life? If you count online matches with the boys and my homie, then yeah, sure—Otherwise, it's a big nuh uh.

  Then it happened. I started feeling like I was inhaling fire every time I breathed. My whole body ached like my head my knee, my back, and my everything. Couldn't sleep, and probably slept like three times a week for 2 hours. But did I go to a doctor? Nah. I thought, “It’s just a cold.” and I excuse it because money problems. Brilliant thinking, right

  Took some pills lying around—thought they were vitamins. One was actually a sleeping pill, the other was calcium. Turns out that combo doesn't exactly scream “life extension.”

  Few days ter...

  THUD!

  I dropped dead in a middle of lecture. Just like that. No drama, no Hollywood-style monologue. Just… lights out.

  Next thing I knew, I was in a strange pce. Vines twisted through the sky and glowing golden tree's everywhere. The ground was made of purple dust that crunched like sand. And there it stood—a giant tree or whatever 'universe tree' they call. Gigantic. Ancient. Unreal.

  And then he showed up: the God who ruled it. It procimed itself as “The Author”

  Now, like any good weeb, I imagined my isekai welcome god would be some cute anime goddess with massive… You know... Very massive personalities. But no. Big no no no. This guy looked like an armored horror from a Dark Souls boss fight—skeletal hands, glowing eyes, voice that echoed like a death bell.

  He gave me two options:

  Reincarnate into a random world like the usual isekai stuff.Get my own bnk-ste world—a pce that I can do whatever I want. Think of it like MinecraftObviously, I chose the god-mode option aka the gamemode creative (not really creative to be honest). I mean, who wouldn’t want to rule their own world? Shaping your kingdom, then becoming known as King Adam the first, the very ruler and the first human to ever known!

  But here’s the catch: just because I can reincarnate whenever I want doesn’t mean I’m good at surviving.

  I died. A lot. I mean it. A LOT. Lava, monsters, starvation, falling off cliffs, some scary-ass eldritch beast out of the netherworld I somehow encountered.

  At first, it was fun. I mean, no real consequences, right? I could run around naked, punch dragons in the face, YOLO into volcanoes. And test if there was fall damage or the respawn mechanic. But apparently I can't respawn back to the same world so there goes some progress in some world's (In which there was NO progress at all)

  I would also want to add that just because I watched every shonen anime known to man (Maybe not all or just recent ones) doesn’t mean I can actually fight. Turns out all that training arc knowledge and W-A-S-D controls doesn’t help when you can’t even lift a sword right.

  So yeah… 99 deaths ter, here I am. Again.

  Still dumb. Still reckless. Still trying to figure out how to survive in a world I supposedly own with absolutely no conscious soul from Earth.

  Let’s see how long I st this time.

  Let's-uh... Py back that darn moment with that “The Author” god guy.

  “Come on! Just give me one more chance!”

  I begged. Not my proudest moment, but hey, desperation is a powerful motivator.

  Then instead of a very sighed and tired voice, The Author voice thundered down like a divine hammer into my veins.

  “REPENT THOSE WORDS YOU MORTAL?! ONE MORE CHANCE YOU SAY?! HAH! MORTAL, I AM NOT ONE TO SOW ENMITY LIGHTLY, BUT YOU—YOU ARE OF AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT BREED OF A HOMO-SAPIEN!”

  Yeah. Uhh...

  “‘Different breed’? Tch. You haven’t seen my full potential yet, Lord Authority. One day, even the strongest dragons will be reduced to bones by these hands!”

  To this day, I still don't know why the heck I just spat that out randomly.

  Then he ughed in a very deep, mocking sound that echoed through the entire realm itself.

  “POTENTIAL? HAH! YOU DARE SPEAK OF POTENTIAL?! HAHAH! YOU, WHO JUMPED OFF A CLIFF TO TEST THIS SO CALLED 'FALL DAMAGE'?! YOU, WHO FELL INTO A SHALLOW CAVE AND SKEWERED YOURSELF ON A ROCK? YOU, WHO WERE DEVOURED BY ZOMBIES BECAUSE YOU FAILED TO RUN? YOU, WHO WERE EXECUTED FOR STEALING BREAD, AND ACCIDENTALLY IMPALED YOURSELF WHILE BOASTING OF YOUR 'SWORD SKILLS'? SHALL I CONTINUE THE LIST OF YOUR PITIFUL ENDS?! YOU, THREW YOURSELF EXPOSED INTO THE MAGMA TO TEST IF YOU COULD COME BACK?! SHOULD I?! HM?!”

  Did he have to bring up the bread, va and sword one?

  “THIS MARKS YOUR NINETY-NINTH DEATH, MORTAL! NINETY-NINE! I HAVE CREATED AND DESTROYED ENTIRE WORLDS, AND YOU—YOU—CANNOT SURVIVE MORE THAN A WEEK! NINETY-NINE LEAVES WASTED! LOOK AT THESE LEAVES RIGHT HERE! I HAVE NEVER IN MY EONS I HAVE SEEN SUCH FOOLISHNESS!”

  …Okay, that part was news to me when I just popped up here.

  In my defense (sort of), I really thought that decades of anime, JRPGs, Hack-n-ssh and binging survival game content would make me invincible. Turns out that pressing W-A-S-D and quoting shonen protagonists doesn’t make you Kirito. It makes you a delulu.

  I tried to py it cool.

  “Well, uh… sometimes a man just messes up his build, right? Mistakes happen right?”

  That didn’t go over well.

  “I REQUIRE WARRIORS, NOT JESTERS! YOU WERE OFFERED PEACE—FREEDOM FROM THE CYCLE OF REBIRTH! A RELEASE FROM SAMSARA! AND YET, YOU CHOOSE AGAIN TO PLUNGE INTO THE FLAMES!”

  What he meant was: go to the afterlife already dumbass.

  But that pce? Don't expect the heavenly realms to be full of goddesses with... Ahem very good personalities... Instead it’s like an infinite room full of dead family members, philosophers, historical figures, and warlords arguing over whether they’re dead for real. And watching their successors buying anime figurines or increasing trade taxes to the absolute.

  “That ‘afterlife’ is more like a waiting room in hell! Sit around in nothingness forever? No thanks.”

  Then he lowered his scary-ass statue face to mine. His glowing eyes felt like he was looking into my past sins. I swear he saw the exact dolr amount I spent on gachapon in Akihabara trip.

  “LISTEN CLOSELY, MORTAL. I TIRE OF THIS BACK-AND-FORTH EVENTS. I HAVE SOULS TO JUDGE, WORLDS TO SEED. THESE LEAVES. THEY ARE MY CREATIONS! AND YOU WASTE THEM LIKE A CHILD SMASHING TOYS!”

  I stayed silent. For once.

  “Alright, alright god. Just put me in another new world. I pro—”

  “NO. I'M CHOOSING THIS TIME MORTAL.”

  I had begged for another custom world—like before. The ‘Minecraft-God-Mode’ world where I was supposed to rule like a king. But I guess this time he wasn’t letting me choose.

  He began searching. And searching. And... still searching. After what felt like twenty minutes (which, in ADHD and dumbass with no attention span years, is basically a century), I gave in to boredom. Rolled around in the weird purple sand. Dug a pit as deep as I can. Took a nap.

  “Dude… are you gonna find that world or not?”

  His head turned and twisted towards me like some horrific type of haunted house ghost. I stumbled back like it was about eat me.

  “WHAAA!?”

  “FIRST—DO NOT CALL ME ‘DUDE’! SECOND—BE NOT AFRAID! THIRD—HAVE PATIENCE, WORM!”

  Noted. Never call high status figures 'Dude'

  At st, after like an hour or less, he raised a glowing leaf in his hand. It emanated with strange golden glow. It drew me in as if I'm being hypnotized.

  “Whoaaaaaaaaaaaaa...”

  “TERRAEITHNE—A CREATION OF MY OWN, BORN OF BONES AND BLOOD WITH INSPIRATION FROM YOUR MORTAL REALM STRIPPED OF IT'S INNOVATIONS. IT IS A LAND OF HISTORY AND BLOOD: THE UNITED EMPIRES OF THE WEST, THE WARRING STATES OF THE EAST, THE WILD TRIBES OF THE FRONTIERS, AND THE MYSTIC LEGENDS THAT HAUNT TO IT'S ORIGINS. A MIRROR OF THE MORTAL WORLD CALLED EARTH, OF IT'S MYTHS AND MADNESS, PEACE AND CHAOS. IT IS A FAVORED DESTINATION FOR MORTALS OF YOUR KIND.”

  That made me pause. Pce like Earth?

  “Wait—Earth?! You're not just sending me to some kind of twisted version of my old home just so I can—”

  Then again, he proceeded to cut me off by bsting purple sand all over my face.

  “SSSSSSSSSSSILENCE! DO NOT UTTER ANOTHER THOUGHTLESS QUERY! I DO NOT SEEK THY DEATH—THOU INVITE IT WITH OPEN ARMS. AND YET… EVEN I CANNOT DENY THY STUBBORN EXISTENCE. THOU REFUSE THE AFTERLIFE, DEFY THE WHEEL. THOU ART… AN IRRITATION—AND YET, CURIOUS.”

  That's the first and probably the st semi-compliment he’s ever gave. Of course, he wrapped it in an insult.

  “IF IT IS REDEMPTION YOU SEEK, TERRAEITHNE WILL OFFER THE STAGE FOR YOU. YOU SHALL MEET ALLIES. YOU MAY EVEN SAVE THE WORLD FROM ITS ROT—THE DEMON KING WHATEVER THE MORTALS SAY IN THEIR SO-CALLED REINCARNATION, THE DARKNESS, THE DISSONANCE. BUT KNOW THIS: THERE IS NO ABSOLUTE PEACE, NOR ABSOLUTE EVIL. I AM BALANCE ITSELF: ORDER AND DISORDER, SHAPE AND ENTROPY. I WILL NOT HESITATE TO RESHAPE THE BALANCE AND EVEN ORDER YOUR LIFE AROUND. THE EQUILLIBRIUM MUST BE UPHELD IN EVERY WORLD. HOWEVER… IF YOU DIE AGAIN—THIS TIME, IT WILL BE YOUR LAST. NO RESPAWN. NO REINCARNATION. NO ‘EXTRA LIVES’. YOU SHALL FADE INTO THE SILENCE OF THE BRIGHT AND MEET YOUR ANCESTORS”

  Okay. No pressure. I mean A LOT of pressure.

  And yet… for the first time in ages (or maybe it happened a hundred times already), something stirred in me. A flicker. A spark. Maybe… maybe I’d actually try and not jump into va naked.

  “Well… I could do this. But, can I uhh, on one condit—”

  I never finished my sentences because of him. His roar shook the realm, bsted me back, tumbling down the purple sand which I may have accidentally have in my mouth.

  “WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT ISSSSSSS ITTTTT NOOOOOOOW?! MUST I SUMMON GODDESSES, UNIVERSAL BEASTS OR OBJECTS OR EVEN BESTOW YOU WITH CHEAT AND EXPLOITATIONS TO THE FABRIC OF THE UNIVERSE?! ABSOLUTELY NOT!”

  “Bleugh! How did you know I was gonna say that?”

  “I know enough of your kind.”

  That came with a very deep voiced deadpan. I could hear the collective trauma of every isekai protagonist delulu's he encountered in his voice.

  “Okay okay—what about a weapon? Like at least give me some stuff before I leave.”

  Then he threw a book at my face. Metaphorically by the way.

  The cover read:“How to Not Die Like a Fool: With Commentary Edition”

  I have never been so deeply offended in my entire life.

  “THIS IS YOUR ARMAMENT, MORTAL. WITHIN ARE THE CHRONICLES OF THY STUPIDITY. ALL NINETY-NINE DEATHS WITH MY OWN VERY PERSONAL COMMENTARY AND THE HIGHER-UPS. STUDY IT. OR, PERHAPS, THROW IT AT AN ENEMY. BLUNT-FORCE IDIOCY MAY YET BE YOUR TRUE TALENT. AHAHAH!”

  Great. No Excalibur. No magic fireball. No Hollow Purple. No Kamehameha. No Quirk or Bankai. Just a roast and a reminder on how stupid I am.

  Now's not the perfect time to argue or that guy will have second thoughts to whether I live or not. And then, the ground trembled. A stairway rised from the purple sands, gleaming like the heavens itself. At its top, the colossal door, where I go through every time

  “Go, then. Your world awaits. And DO NOT COME BACK HERE.”

  I swallowed hard. My legs shook like those cartoon nervous shaking sound. This was my st chance. Die here, and it’s game over forever.

  I climbed. At the top, opened the door and as I peek in, the light surrounded me. I took a deep breath… and ran forward into the blinding light.

  Just as I passed through, I heard his voice behind me.

  “…Wait. Where did I put the door at?”

  …

  …

  …

  “…Wait a minute what the hell?!”

  And suddenly—no light.

  Wind.

  Sky.

  No ground.

  AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!